Day One, Total Disaster. Or, at least it can’t get worse.

I had plans for Day One.

I was going to redo my resume, peruse job postings, and fix up my LinkedIn profile. I was going to write a blog post with a carefully considered combination of wry humour and emotional insight.

Instead, I locked myself out of the house for 10 hours.

Through a series of sillinesses, I ended up staring at the locked entryway to the apartment, dressed in ratty old jeans with a hole in the crotch and a fluffy pink jumper; the latest New Yorker magazine in one hand and my car keys in the other.

9 AM, on the first Monday of My Super Serious Grown Up Job Search, and my house-keys were in the pocket of my jogging pants, while I was outside, freezing. AND DRESSED IN PINK. I’d grabbed the car keys totally forgetting I’d detached the house keys for a jog – which to be fair is my own fault for going for a jog.

As I didn’t have my wallet (I’d just been going to check the mail!) I also didn’t have my drivers licence on me, which meant I reckoned that driving the hour to Engineer’s work to grab his keys was a bad idea. I mean, lets face it, if on any day I was going to get pulled over by the cops …

I also didn’t have my phone to call Engineer. Even if I had, given it was his first day back, I wasn’t going to be all damsel-in-distress-y. Plus he might have laughed at me.

I drove the 10 minutes to the in-laws place instead. Turns out they don’t have spare keys, but they do have big hugs and they make a pretty awesome cuppa, so I hung out there for a while. Then, on to my mum’s (10 minutes from them), but she wasn’t in……..so I sat in the car in her front drive for a few hours. It’s a bit more hidden than the car park at home so it felt less like someone was going to try and have me arrested for vagrancy.

Eventually, Engineer got home and let me in. He laughed but also was rather sweet, thank God.

So what did I achieve on Day One?

Well, I cleaned the car, both inside and outside, and discovered a few spare New Yorkers, and an old CD I’d been missing. Plus, like five lipsticks. I also found a bottle of Shiraz in my boot which I guess I have for emergencies…..I didn’t indulge, but I tell you what, I thought about it! So I got my reading in, and a bit of light physical exercise.

My mother, bless her, would say that I didn’t accidentally lock myself out – but rather my subconscious was trying to find a way to avoid job-searching. I’m not sure what I think about that, and Engineer would say that I’m just a bit of a duffer and often forget keys/wallet/brain/name. Whatever it was, it was not a good start. How can I possible write that I have ‘high attention to detail’ in a job applications now?

At least tomorrow will have to be better.

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